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The latest Phil Evans column – January 31

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The latest Phil Evans column – January 31

Posted By RobertLloyd58


The year 2024 barely started when we were battered by storm after storm – and according to those highly paid and sometimes highly irritating weather forecasters, in-between the storms, we’ve had heavy rain and wind.

Err . . . excuse me: isn’t a storm basically a meteorological mixture of heavy rain and wind?

Perhaps telling us Storm Bonnie will follow Storm Shaky is tedious, so they break the monotony by suggesting something else is causing us to get wet. And cold. And miserable.

The storms around my way worried me, because I’ve got a new garden shed – and it wasn’t cheap!

Well, okay it was. But that’s not the point. I was concerned it might be damaged by the elements.

The morning after one powerful storm, in which the winds whipped up to 80 miles an hour, I looked out of my back bedroom window in trepidation (which is a small suburb of Ammanford) to check on my shed. Fortunately, it was still in one piece. Unfortunately, it was in Birmingham.

Now, I make no apology for re-cycling that joke from a year or so ago as it’s a favourite and I’ll probably drag it out of semi-retirement one more time before I send it off to the old jokes home.

At this point, let me make it clear I’m not a conspiracy theorist.

Though, oddly, I do have a theory about conspiracy theorists that until now I’ve only shared with a few like-minded people.

Which, on reflection, does suggest I’m a conspiracy theorist. Hmm…

Okay. My theory is… storms have become more frequent, more powerful and more destructive since some ‘Genius’ decided to give them names.

Until a year or so ago, weather forecasters just warned us that ‘a storm’ was on its way. It arrived, it went and there was always a long respite before the next one.

Since they’ve been given names, the publicity has gone to their heads, so now they rapidly follow one after another, each of them desperate to be the next scary storm to have their name splashed all over the media.

It’s only a theory.

But it’s got you thinking, hasn’t it?


Comical Conversation Crisis

I couldn’t help but notice the dire state of conversation during a recent dinner function.

Picture this: a table of eight friends, each one engrossed in their mobile phones, completely oblivious to the delicious food placed in front of them.

It seems that the art of engaging in a genuine conversation with another human beings is on life support. In fact, I fear that soon people won’t even bother talking to each other at all!

But the struggle doesn’t end there.

Navigating through town has become a perilous adventure, with pedestrians glued to their screens, oblivious to the world around them. They stroll in a straight line as if it’s their divine right, while the rest of us perform acrobatic manoeuvres to avoid colliding with them.

Believe it or not, the statistics are staggering.

Last year alone, approximately 1900 pedestrians sought medical treatment for accidents caused by walking and texting simultaneously.

And get this: a few years back, a 14-year-old daredevil fell a whopping eight feet off a bridge while attempting the dangerous feat of texting and walking!

So, here’s a challenge for you.

The next time you dine out, take a moment to count the number of phones being used at the table.

Trust me, it’ll be an eye-opening experience.

And if you find yourself agreeing with my observations, well, let’s just say I told you so!

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Written by RobertLloyd58

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