CAN I ASK IF OVERUSED EXPRESSIONS HAPPEN FOR A REASON?
There are many expressions that people use, that when you pause to think about them, are completely meaningless.
A prime example is a six-word sentence that, if there was a competition to find the most pointless six-word sentence of all time, would win the top prize. Which of course would have to be something equally pointless.
I’m pretty sure you’ve heard your friends, colleagues and relatives use it occasionally and you may well be ‘guilty’ of it, too.
And it’s this . . .
“Can I ask you a question?”
Whenever anyone says that to me, I want to say (politely, naturally!), “You do realise that by pre-empting asking me a question by asking me if you can ask me a question, you’ve already asked me a question?”
By the time they’ve mulled over and absorbed the logic of the question I’ve asked them, they’ve usually forgotten the question they’d asked me if they could ask me.
One of the most pointless sentences of modern times – and one I just can’t buy – has to be “Everything happens for a reason”.
Really?
People often use that expression to comfort themselves or the people around them when something bad occurs.
I understand that. But when you look around the world, at what’s happening in conflicts and natural disasters – how can anyone honestly believe they happen ‘for a reason’?
The line “Can I ask you a question?” turns up in films and TV dramas as often as “Try and get some rest!”
Whether it’s romantic dramas, thrillers, westerns, cop shows or soaps, the line invariably pops up somewhere.
I’m suddenly reminded of a story I read years ago about a group of successful Hollywood writers who decided, as an in-joke, to always put “Try and get some rest” in all their scripts.
Then they’d have an annual get together and toast the writer who’d managed to shoe-horn the line into the most unlikeliest scene.
Maybe something like…
“Great King of Thebes. I have just slain the three-headed Hydra . . . battled the Cyclops . . . and destroyed the Thracian army!”
“Well done, Hercules. Now try and get some rest!”
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Holiday Costs Skyrocket, Leaving Parents Bewildered and Broke!
In a shocking twist, holiday prices have once again shot through the roof, leaving families across the country unable to afford quality time together.
It’s no secret that during peak school holiday periods, the price of a getaway can be a jaw-dropping two to six times higher than usual.
It’s a blatant act of exploitation that has the majority of the public up in arms. And who can blame them?
Desperate to make magical memories, many parents find themselves drowning in debt, burdened with exorbitant interest rates for the mere privilege of borrowing money for a much-needed break.
It’s an additional expense on top of an already-inflated holiday budget.
Gone are the days when families would embark on adventurous trips to Porthcawl and Barry Island during the miners’ fortnight.
Those old, musty caravans, where the whole clan had to trek half a mile for a toilet visit and endure a chilly shower, are now a distant memory.
Let’s not forget the arduous task of lugging around water butts just to have a cup of tea, coffee, or squash. And, to top it all off, it seemed like it rained more often than not!
But, believe it or not, those two weeks in Wales taught us valuable lessons in outdoor survival and even prepared us for the prestigious Duke of Edinburgh Award.
While I can’t say I miss those challenging times, I’m sure many of our readers would agree that they were truly character-building experiences that have left us with incredible stories and memories to share with the younger generation.
So, let’s raise our glasses to the good old days of adventure and resilience, and hope that one day, affordable family holidays will be within reach again!”
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Comedian Phil Evans is from Ammanford. He is known as the man who puts the ‘cwtsh’ into comedy.
You can follow Phil Evans on Twitter @philevanswales and www.philevans.co.uk
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